How to Talk to Your Children About Surrogacy
You know your child(ren) best. Teaching them about surrogacy, and why it is so important, is going to look different for every family. You would be surprised how much children actually understand when you’re just clear and honest with them.
Tell them about why you want to become a surrogate. Tell them about your intended parents and specifically why they can’t have a baby without help. Tell your child(ren) about why they are so important in your life and how you want others to be able to experience the joy of having children.
A valuable resource in these discussions is the variety of books available for children that cover the topics of surrogacy, alternative family building, and diverse family structures. Discover our recommended reading list for children by viewing our blog on Surrogacy Books For Kids.
Surrogacy can offer valuable lessons to children about family diversity. Your children may gain a new understanding and appreciation for the love, sacrifice, and collaboration that comes along with you being a surrogate, fostering empathy and acceptance towards different family dynamics. If the intended parents are a same-sex couple, and you haven’t spoken to your child(ren) about LGBTQ+ people yet, this is a great opportunity to have that conversation.
As a surrogate, you demonstrate to your children the importance of openness, communication, and honesty in relationships, as they navigate questions and discussions about their own origins and identity. Overall, becoming a surrogate can provide children with a broader perspective on family, relationships, and the beauty of diverse family units.
Often children are very excited and proud and want to share about your surrogacy journey with others, sometimes complete strangers. After a couple months there will be physical evidence (your beautiful belly) of your surrogacy and people will ask about your pregnancy. It is important that when you share information with your child(ren), you are clear about what you want shared with your community and what you’d prefer to keep private.
Children often form a bond with the intended parents and the surrogate child, similar to that of extended family. Everyone takes part in creating families through surrogacy.
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